Ongoing List

There are several things that seem to always be on my life's "To Do" list.  Probably at the top is losing weight.  So, again tomorrow I will attempt to watch what I eat and work out.  Am I enthused?  No.  Doubtful?  Yes.  I came across heandsheeatclean.com and liked what I saw.  So, here is what I propose.  For six days a week I will eat "clean" or as close to it as I can.  Then for one day I will eat whatever my heart's desire.  We'll see how it goes.  The number of 45 pounds seems so daunting to me.  However, the journey of a thousand miles...
I do believe one day I will get this right.  One day I will have this issue of weight tackled.  Maybe tomorrow's that day...

My Happiness

Just reading this title makes me think "Am I being selfish?"  After hearing some close friends discuss this book "The Happiness Project" I am now in the midst of reading it.  It's May so I'm "learning how to have fun".  Who knew I would have to learn?  But after reading the book, I've realised I have systematically removed fun from my life.  Maybe "learn" is not the precise word I'm looking for but "reintroduce" would fit better.  I am a list maker, obviously by the title of this blog and therefore a majority if not all that makes my daily list are tasks that must be accomplished in the course of the day to keep my family going.  Any "frivolous" pursuits never even make the list.  So today, I made a new kind of list titled "Fun Things". 
1.  Walk the dog.
I don't necessarily think "ooh, walking the dog will be fun" but I do get a great sense of enjoyment when I do it.
2. Scrapbook.
As nerdy as it sounds, I really like scrapbooking.  I've just not done it in a long time due to my idea of it will not be done right.  "Done right" to me means everything up to date.  That's just not gonna happen.  My oldest, my stepson's, scrapbook I believe is at his kindergarten year - he will be entering middle school in the fall!  Oh well, I'll jump in where I am.  I will still find fun in this endeavor however old the photos.
3.  Go to a museum.
Aaah, this one has never made any list and you wanna know why?  My man would not go.  Why have I put off something I enjoy because my man is not up for it?  Since when did I think he and I have the same exact likes?  I'll admit I'm scared to go something alone but I believe it will be worth it.  Admittedly it will be a little bit of a pain in the butt arranging childcare but I believe it will be worth it.
4.  Wear dresses daily.
I would love this.  Something about the feel of a dress automatically makes me feel more like a woman and when I feel more like a woman, I'm happy.  Now, will I really wear a dress daily? No but putting this on my list means I will put more of an effort:)  In fact, I bought a new dress Thursday and I love it!  I really love the 50's when women wore dresses just about everyday with a set of pearls.  I need some pearls but honestly, I would feel awkward wearing them.  Do you know a woman who just fits the part of wearing pearls and she does wear them?  I have a friend like that. She just looks the part of "little Miss Betty Homemaker" and she is!  Her house has great little crafts made by her while her children are clothed in clothes made by her.  When she smiles, I swear I see the shiny gleam and hear a "ting" come from her teeth!  Maybe a dress will do all this for me- maybe.
5. Journal
I love it.  Journaling is therapeutic.  As cliche' as that sounds, it's true.  I need it and I can look back and see when my life is frazzled, I have not journaled in a while.  The whole point of this blog was to journal, to get my emotions and life happenings down on a page all the while possibly connecting with others who feel or experience the same.  What has held me back or contributed to long gaps between postings?  Fear.  And stress.  Fear over what will people think of me?  I have tried somewhat to keep a spirit of anonymity for this blog. I do not state my name or my family members names but honestly it wouldn't be hard to figure it out.  So, I keep to safe topics or superficial topics but where does my true happiness come from as related to journaling?  My raw words and emotions on a page.  When I'm mad or even happy and can write freely, I get the most relief. 
I like to read.  I would not call myself an avid reader but I like to read.  And mostly fiction does not often make my list.  It's usually self-help or the story of some one's struggle and success.  Why?  Because I can identify with the author, I can connect.  And I want the same with my journaling.  So where do I draw the line?  What is enough or not enough to put on a blog?  I'm not sure but I am willing to find out.
Five fun things.  Will they bring happiness to my life?  We'll see.  I'm off to see if I can get 1st grade down on a scrapbook page:)

Week 1 - done!

I am in to one week of attempting to lose weight.  I have slowly put on the pounds for so long now that it is slightly astounding at how much I weigh.  I have a goal of losing 50 pounds this year and thus far, I have lost 3.6 pounds.  I would like to lose 2 pounds per week.  Now, that being said, I'm a little annoyed that I have to give up my junk food.  However, I do have some good friends who have given me encouragement. 
I am following one friend's advice right now as I chew gum while trying not to think of Ben and Jerry's Phish Food that I would love to consume.  Plus, I checked out the book Made to Crave based on the recommendation of another friend.  And... I am now a part of a weight loss group via Facebook.  Lastly, I log my food intake on myfitnesspal.com  If I'm not fully equipped then I don't know who is:)

Is it fitting that I have entered this post with a picture of me next to a GIGANTIC cow?  I will say I am seven months pregnant in the pic:)

Me and my girl

So, as with the masses of other women in my area, I too, am a Pinterest addict.  The site is pretty awesome considering all the ways I've implemented my repins over the last couple of weeks.  Today on my Saturday "To Do" list:  1.  DO NOT stress over my workload, focus only on family this weekend.  2.  Go shopping.  3.  Make Baked S'mores. 
I am happy to say, I have COMPLETED my list.  Aaaahhh!  What wonder, what joy.  Pay no mind to the fact that it was a simple list.  Do you know how long it has been since I have felt any sense of accomplishment?

I have a wonderful relationship with my mom today; however, it is one I feel I must put effort in to be a success.  I do not have a lot of one-on-one memories with her from my childhood.  She is what I would call a "survivor" not one for lovey-dovey stuff.  So, one of my goals is to have ample lovey-dovey moments with my one and only girl.  She was my assistant today as we made the S'mores.

I found the recipe off of Pinterest from the site The Apron Gal.  Here are some pictures of how the process looks.

I layered the crust with the chocolate squares then added the marshmallow cream then the final layer of crust.  The Apron Gal does a good job of how to do the layers.



Finally!

I knew it would be this way.  I knew that deep down I would not set forth any big goals or write in this blog until baby arrived.  And...baby has arrived!  It's like my only focus was counting down the days until the birth and now he's already 3 days old!  I want to stop time right now.  I want to hold him and remember this feeling for the rest of my life: the softness of his hair, the smoothness of his skin, how tiny he feels in my arms, how thankful I am that God blessed us with another child.  Quattro made his appearance this week and he is beautiful!  I am already on the internet looking for healthy food sources to help me be successful with my breastfeeding.  I'm open to any recommendations, suggestions, or websites you know of that can give me some much needed info:)

Update

I have done pretty well with my "To Do" list this afternoon but hit a roadblock when I went to update the school website for the Holiday Auction.  I have now tried on two different occasions to edit that particular page and so far - nothing.  A little frustrated but I e-mailed the web designer and I'm sure it will get cleared up tomorrow. 

As far as everything else in my life, I'm okay.  A lot of "what if's" in my head and apprehension for the upcoming auction as well as excitement over the fact that Quattro will be making an appearance in 10 weeks.  Hoping that over the next 3 weeks I do really well with my follow through.  And one thing I would mark down as a success would be if I posted pictures to this blog sometime in the near future.  (We'll see)

Confessions

I am a big fan of Dave Ramsey.  Now let me clarify.  Being a big fan and applying his principles to my life are right now on opposite ends of the spectrum.  If you're not familiar with his radio program, he not only takes calls to answer financial questions but he takes calls to allow people to share their "Debt Free Scream" which is a time to share how much debt they have paid off and in what time.   I would LOVE to be a caller.  Now while I have yet to hear people proudly claim how much debt they are currently in, I do hear the joy of the callers when they get to share how much they have paid off.  Therefore, with embarrassment, I'm confessing I have $10,000 in debt to pay off.  It is a slow process, one that we have paid off and then got right back in.  There are things in my life that I could really be successful in if I could get a hold of self-control.
So here's my admission posted on my sidebar for all to see.  Hopefully, like admitting my waist size, this will be a motivation for moving in the right direction and paying off this debt.